2 suicides, an attempted rape, 2 separations, a heart attack, spitting, screaming and smelly people. What got into people this week?
John Edwards told us of a meeting of Wordplay on 9 November at Chadwick’s bar Villa Martin at 7.30. Members read 300 words from a short story.
We started off with the leftovers from last week. John Major read a piece from an ongoing story. Ann was sitting in the front room reading when Bill her brother in law came in, he smelt her scent, he followed her, she panicked and tried to get out. ‘I always get what I want.’ He forced her onto the sofa. If she wouldn‘t cooperate, she would have to join Michelle in the woods (a girl he had previously murdered). At that moment his wife and kids came in, ‘She led me on, nothing happened’ Bill said to his wife. ‘Be out of here tomorrow‘ Mary said to Ann, and then collected her thoughts. Ann filled the bathtub, took tablets, got in the water and cut her arms. She was going to a better place but she was taking a baby with her. Mary realised it was her husband who was at fault and told Bill to break the door down but it was too late. Can't wait to read the book.
There were useful comments.
Douglas read the start of a story consisting of 125 words. He could hear his heart beating, he heard a scream and realised the scream was his own. This was for a competition in the Mail on Sunday; entries have to be sent in by 29 Oct. There is a prize of £200.
Gerry wrote on the theme ‘That’s not what I heard ‘(theme from last week). His story was about a fast-track DC from public school and his old fashioned DCI, and the conflict between their two ways of solving crime. Comments were that it was too adverb-rich (nice word Mike).i.e. the DCI was disdainful, testy, irascible.
Jenny’s story was about a young lady who worked difficult hours. She was a concerned mum during the day but when she got to work it was all different. She wore red lipstick and red stilettos. The roulette table was in full swing, she gave a big smile, she hoped some punters would be lucky and she would get some big tips. It is 4 a.m., one man left at the table ‘You have lost £3,000 Joe’ his friend says. He gets up from the table with his head in his hands; he clutches his chest and falls to the floor. Just another night’s work for a croupier. Jenny wrote the piece for a writing competition about people‘s memoirs.
Mike wrote about a carnival that takes place in November in his home town of Bridgewater. The carnival takes 2 hours to pass, there are 100 floats, each one with 15,000 light bulbs and deafening music. It has taken place since 1605 just before Guy Fawkes Night every year.
Maureen’s tale was of a walking trip up a mountain. Agostina, a South American lady, sounds a lovely woman with sensible clothes and a moustache. Unfortunately she wore the same clothes for the whole holiday. Maureen more or less pushed her up the mountain, she farted all the way up and when she got to the top she fell asleep and snored. Charming.
Ann wrote a piece about the virus affecting a group of immigrants from the UK. To keep their culture alive they formed the TWC. All goes well until the time for hot pen. Some people develop a nervous tic, some go to their local hospital rather than attend, Hot pen is placing a heavy burden on people, and it is a matter of grave concern. These were happy smiling people who now suffer from mood swings. It is reasonable to assume this would not have happened without hot pen virus, and now the virus is infecting other breakaway groups. She begs people to bin this invidious and insidious infection. Very funny and apt.
Anne wrote on the theme of ‘Before the colour fades.’ About a change of hair colour which makes a big difference to the way us ladies feel.
Mary (one of the three hale Marys) wrote a poem about ‘All legs and knickers.’ She is learning the tango and her legs are going where they have never been before. She felt quite dizzy, and landed flat on the floor. I hope you didn’t show your knickers Mary.
Jane is editing her story about life in France with her husband. They received an invitation to the French revolution celebration in the village. The tables cleared and the people danced. A man in a beret with grey hair came over and wanted to dance with Jane. She was forced to dance with the man for England. Mr Clement was very drunk and spat in her face. After many dances she was saved by the bell heralding a break for the musicians. Entente cordial and all that. Very descriptive.
Brenda continued her story. Daisy had been murdered and Minerva had to get away. She went to work and as she hadn’t finished her work Mary said she had to stay behind, Sam came out of his office and beckoned her over. What is going on with you and Mary? ‘ She said ‘As from today I haven’t got anywhere to live and am frightened to walk the streets.’ He said his father owned properties in the area and was sure he could find her a place to live. He asked her to become an assistant in the office while he took over his father’s duties in the factory. Is this the start of a better life or another wrong step? The story continues –
Heather also wrote on the theme ‘That’s not what I heard.’ The tale concerned the folly of an aged man seeking to change himself with a new wife, as if everything else would stay the same, and children and friends wouldn’t change towards him. Excellent as always.
John read the second part of a story about a negotiator who had just saved someone from jumping off a bridge. Sue had wanted him to get home by a certain time but now he just wanted to relax and watch the football. He let himself in; his wife was sitting in the corner. 'I thought we agreed you would come straight home'. ‘You know how it is.’ ‘Oh yes I know how it is‘. This sounds serious he thought. This was in the category of 7-10 in his negotiating manual meaning that care was needed to solve the problem, but he could usually talk her round. Sue said ‘I have been unhappy for a long time. I am leaving you and the kids are coming with me.’ He felt paralysed. ‘Me and the kids are at the bottom of your list. Don’t think I don’t know about your affair with the Jones girl. I hope you’re happy.’ The car drove away. He vomited. This cannot happen to me, his game was up, he had lost everything, he would be a laughing stock. He went upstairs, and took two-thirds of a bottle of tablets. His negotiating skills hadn’t worked this time.