I´ve been having a bit of bother with my computer lately and felt like expressing my feelings as the puppy is doing. Wish I could be as laid back as the kitten.Talking of laid back, that was the feeling in the group this week. Very relaxed and pleasant and a good time had by all.
Not so many present as last week but a good number - about 15, I think.
Nik spoke about competitions and handed out copies of this month´s to those without a whizz box. If you don´t have stamps (which have now gone up to 56 pence), then don´t send a
SAE . Simply say that your offering is disposable copy.
Heinke´s book has come out and looked very attractive, I must say. She, however, is not a happy bunny as she has so far found over 50 typos and, if I understood properly, nothing can be done about it now - the printing process has gone too far. I´ll bet she could do a puppy all over the printers, who´ve messed up her baby. Never mind, Heinke. Keep all the faulty copies - you´ll be able to sell them at an enormous profit on Ebay when you´ve won your Nobel Prize.
Nan wrote on today´s subject "Are we there yet?". Hers was a nostalgic piece about day trips to the seaside, back in the day. Many an eye misted over at the descriptions of crunching into cheese sandwiches with sand in them and dresses tucked into knickers before paddling in the freezing water.....
Gerry continued his ghostly tale of the trucker trying to make sense of his weird experience in the mountains meeting people who´d been dead for years in places which no longer exist. Very gripping. Gerry´s writing, it was agreed, had come on no end. Good on you, Gerry!
Alan declared that he felt his true metier is that of a repressed Daily Telegraph leader writer and gave us a really fascinating piece called "Dropping Pennies". This was also nostalgic, describing the uses an old penny was put to and what it could buy. This could be expanded, it was thought. Nik even remarked that it could do so well that Alan could coin it in. ( You may groan...)
Ann F gave us another of her diary extracts, this time about Facebook and a dead friend. Really good, Ann!
Chris followed on last week´s description of her flatpack Hell with a piece on IKEA, its founder and the products, which all have names. Hence Billy the bookcase and Stubborn the spatula!
Mary K tried her hand at a story this week instead of her usual poetry. It was actually an incident, which she is hoping to get published in People´s Friend. Quite touching, it was - about two people meeting briefly on a plane journey.
Ian read a story he´d reworked from some time ago about the Troubles in Northern Ireland. It was a good story but it was felt it had passed its time and would be more saleable if it were brought up to date and the events recalled as a flashback or something similar. Good writing though - too good not to do something more with it.
As we´d had quite a lot of discussion there were several people who didn´t read so next week Glyn, Stan and John have first go.
Poetry is often discussed in the group and it isn´t everyone´s cup of tea. However, I´m sure the following will give you all a good chuckle.
THESE ARE ENTRIES TO A WASHINGTON POST COMPETITION ASKING
FOR A TWO-LINE RHYME WITH THE MOST ROMANTIC FIRST LINE,
AND THE LEAST ROMANTIC SECOND LINE:
1. My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife,
marrying you has screwed up my life.
2. I see your face when I am dreaming,
that's why I always wake up screaming.
3. Kind, intelligent, loving and hot,
this describes everything you are not.
4. Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss,
but I only slept with you 'cause I was pissed.
5. I thought that I could love no other,
that is until I met your brother.
6. Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you,
but the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's
empty and so is your head.
7. I want to feel your sweet embrace,
but don't take that paper bag off your face.
8. I love your smile, your face, and your eyes,
Damn, I'm good at telling lies!
9. My love, you take my breath away,
What have you stepped in to smell this way?
11. What inspired this amorous rhyme?
two parts vodka, one part lime.
WHO SAID POETRY IS BORING?